Someone's Domicile-Not Mine

 

Grace brought me here in someone's domicile and mercy followed me at the same time.

I was trying to settle down in this familiar land (once wasn't) although it has never been that accommodating to many, but so persistent enough like I always was. I assumed you are already aware about what had happened from reading my previous posts. To cut to the chase, the promised job didn't work out.

When you are in a hostile land, trying to live on your own, you should be grateful for every goodhearted person that comes your way–my kind host is an evident to this scenario. And they deserve plaudits.

This country seems too much to bear anymore. It is so sad that I'm feeling it this way recently. True enough got a deeper reason why my emotional stability is getting low–and now so low.

Not my character really who quits easily–I was never a quitter despite obstacles–I just did unfortunately.

The load is very heavy and I don't see any silver linings yet. And for every prayer is a hope against hope. It is not happening. Perhaps I don't belong here which I have tried to fit in and adjust a million times.

“Head over heels” was the perfect description about my love for this country. I hate to say this, but I am no longer in love like I used to–the more I stay here, the more it's becoming complicated.

At least my host was always there to show the different sides of this territory–in my lonesomeness the past few weeks–when life here wasn't that pleasant as before. Because of them I was able to stay for a month. Heaps of thanks!

What a bitter-sweet life to start the year it was! And all I have to do now is to move on and keep looking for the right place–not necessarily a greener pasture.

I'm no longer impressed like I used to behold this country, but I am so thankful for some people who tried to help me feel at home. Although it will never be a home. It is someone's domicile–not mine.