No Worth A Journey

“Silence is golden” as the idiom goes. I really wanted to keep it this way as much as possible, but just couldn’t avoid querying friends who deserve to know. I had to speak out my heart even if I knew would end a silent war and would call into question among unsupportive friends. I was right.

It was my discernment–my own peace was at stake–so I had to defy them. C’est la vie! And we all should learn to deal with it. I hope they did. 

So will say the same thing I have told my friends about. And feel free to articulate your own judgment or give me a swipe about it. It’s so fine with me. 

Despite my feeling about working for them was like a cat on a hot tin roof, and yet I didn’t shut the door immediately because I do believe each one deserves respect and many chances. They didn’t appreciate that. 

And I had to relinquish some concerns to be honest.

My pride was one. Although it is very obvious that I am more educated and more experienced than they are, but I didn’t think of it a big deal. I am flexible. The funny thing, they looked at me like I am nobody. “It’s too much then!” I told myself.

The feeling of uneasiness was another thing. I didn’t really like the environment there, but I was actually willing to adjust. I had the same scenario before, and so it would be fine as I thought. But they ruined my change of heart by housing me in a forty-dollar-suffocating room, while they live the comfort. “This is no fair business, come on!” I whined telling my friends. And this is a well-funded institution. 

Salary wise was three in the list. I didn’t demand for a specific amount even if they can afford my call. Plus it’s a Christian school and I believe that the people there have high morals. And so I gave them the initiative to consider worth my price. And they gave me nonsense–surprisingly lower than the salary of a house help. See how cunningly advantageous they are of me!? But still I was willing to work for them regardless of this matter. They just didn’t treat me well enough.    

Be trapped in a false hope. I didn’t want to believe but just want to be supportive. Sad to say I didn’t see any direction. But I was happy to help amidst this chaotic position. Again, if only they showed me some respect or treated me fair enough. 

I let them loose, but I let myself go. It’s a shame that I couldn’t work for or with them–they’re no angels I’m excited journeying with anyway–it is no worth a journey.