Libod-libod – Where Endless Journey Begins

In my entire life as a blogger, it was only in 2011 have started featuring my header prolifically – at least twice – one article at the beginning and another one at end of a particular year. Each write up reiterates my annual journey and encapsulates what is expected the year that follows.

Now, I am telling the second one earlier than usual – so the third article is expected in three months time - at the end of this seemingly long year.

“Why libod-libod – where endless journey begins?” my curious friend inquired.

Or let say you have been inquisitive about this, too. Then I have to shatter the silence once again although it’s not my first time doing it.

Aside from expressing my thoughts into writing, I’ve done countless defenses verbally as well. This time is but attending the same question anew.

I want to be unique – that’s all. But more than just being unconventional, I’m aware from the beginning about my concept beyond a shadow of a doubt including worst critics I could possibly get from sentient readers.

My statement such as “I want to be unique” also implies not wanting my blog to sound preachy or churchy – this is not the right place to expose my theological view or any biblical stand that disturbs every mind. I trust that my friends are grown ups and so it is their responsibility to nourish themselves at this time point.

And those of different faith or fate, this plot serves a passage way to put my self within reach in order to give these individuals hints and big pictures about my life in need of a grace.     

So sorry to disappoint anyone, but this blog is an account of my day-to-day encounter with people along the way – my personal journal – not a canon.

This is where I express my unspoken notions including brainwaves that entail grace to perceive and mercy to consent – whether an obvious reality or a dejavu in itself.

Apart from sharing my thoughts, I also feature important people here necessarily – they may be angels in disguise or wolves in sheep’s clothing that I come across with. Or like this down-to-earth person I have been meeting this week – who is actually a well known movie producer – this is another manifestation of grace to tell.

Also, since I eye various cultures very much – not to exclude my interest in travel and my keenness about meeting people and my passion for education, then it is forgivable if I entitled my blog as libod-libod - where endless journey begins.

So please don’t get me wrong – this is all I needed.

Mood

They say it takes mood to be able to write well; I say it takes practice and rewriting to be able to come up with a beautiful story. I may sound insolent to somebody’s idea for this, but this doesn’t make sense to me, I bet it goes to some writers too.

If mood is the reason behind authors’ successes, then writing is just moody kind of gift. I don’t think every writer buys this idea – for even an amateur like me set aside mood in quest of becoming a good writer.

Mood is truly deceptive and I don’t write based on emotion. I may need it at times (in rare cases) but hard work and perseverance are musts. 

Got goals as a writer and so relying on mood won’t bring me anywhere. Imagine someone or my every day life trying to publish five to ten articles a month, in my blog – I need no mood to accomplish them – I need my mind and fingers working until the final daft or until I drop – that is writing.

This is just from my own standpoint and therefore arguable.

I have stopped sending entry to Carlos Palanca Awards for Literature for years now, but not for mood’s sake – it is just I’m far. Another consideration is that, sending my entry from here is very stressful and expensive than doing it back home. But I still write and write and write entries.

One of my goals for next year is to join this prestigious literary award – again, and it’s still eight months away from reality. Yet I have been conceptualizing and writing about my theme these past years. It is called preparation – not a moody attempt or driven by mood. I want to have a successful come back – this time.

And I don’t think mood would help.  No, it won’t!

Every time I pay my favorite author’s blog a visit (like every single day), God’s grace always surprises me – one is about this author’s ability to publish hundred or more articles a year – beautifully told and written. And I don’t think they were expressed through moods.

From this, she gives me ideas that writing isn’t about mood (at all times), it’s all about telling stories in season and out of season – writing each word or phrase or sentence or paragraph by heart even if mood isn’t around. 

People say it takes mood to write and I am not sure about that.

I say it takes diligence, endurance along with inspiration and a story to tell to bless every reader – when mood isn’t just enough.

Next Question, Please!

If they only knew that I’ve been living under the grace of One’s loving arms for years now, then they would probably stop asking unethically random questions.

Thanks to His sufficient grace or else I could have been a dead meat this long.

“How much money do you have in the bank?”

“I bet you have saved a lot through these years, haven’t you?”

Inquiries like these usually turn me off no matter how enthusiasm a conversation may seem even with familiar folks. Aside from below the belt jokes or minding other’s private life, query like this I always leave behind unanswered. And I don’t care who I’m talking to – such a dialogue recoils me every time.

“Next question, please!” I write back over and over and over again trying to be polite especially to annoying chats I usually couldn’t bear. And people find it off the wall thinking I have changed a lot.

I just had exactly the same talk a few hours ago thought would be a banter one – with an old friend – a reconnection which turned my stomach for a while. Although I didn’t give that person the next-question-please-reply or block then, which I normally do, leaving one’s nosiness unattended was the best reaction still amidst intolerable situation.

Since chats in every form including Facebook and other greatest inventions have become trendy these days, I couldn’t ask for more except for a sensitive conversation where wealth or marital status or fragile issue is out - let’s talk something else.

The next time you’re stuck in an odd chat, my unsolicited advice for you is a direct discourse which I’ve heard from other people trapped in the same scenario – NEXT QUESTION, PLEASE.  Try this one for it did work for me, too – proven.

For sure, you rather hear someone nattering than engage in a short dialogue that just grates on you. But if it doesn’t really bother you, then lucky you for I am not normal.

Still, I rather listen to a discourse or a serious speech than extend my patience unnecessarily entertaining careless thoughts of others. Then I would be forced to say it in a different way which I was once taught – “Drop It!” – in case saying or writing “Next Question, Please!” isn’t enough to remind someone asking unethical question.

Please, say it or write it with me… Next Question, Please! –  between big smile signs. 

  

Tips: A to F self-reminders

Driven by disappointment, I posted a comment on Facebook sometime this month whining about educators trying to be the men of the world. They are colonialists who work hard to change another country’s education system without necessarily understanding the insiders that well.

Or maybe they do understand, but sad to say they are so stuck in superiority complex not willing to swallow their pride because their educational orientation is still incomparably the best even if it’s not really effective in third world countries. And so they do the same way back home they think cool and awesome – I wish.

I wonder how much aware these educators are for treating their students like dumb asses. I hope they realize that their students aren’t really happy about that. And students are talking about them behind their backs.

Let me stop here or else I will be droning the whole time through.

Since buzzing isn’t really my motive for this article, let me just share some tips if by any chance you are engaging in ESL life at the moment and have been complaining a lot about your unmotivated students. I call these tips as A-F self-reminders.

Agony Syndrome. Teachers and students get this a lot – whether a teacher is suffering because the students are unreceptive or the students are in agony because a teacher is boring. And so I always put the blame on the teachers since they are the pilots in the classroom themselves. This helps me provide an interesting classroom engagement all the time.

Beneficial. I am not just the type of an educator who supplies my students with unnecessary game or activity. As always, I make sure that every activity or game is beneficial and goal oriented. And so I asked my self these questions: What’s my objective for this particular activity? How is this beneficial to a certain skill? If I am teaching a Conversational English, I have to be very careful that this activity helps them talk, not just because this activity is cool or active.

Context. In preparing my lesson, I remind myself too of the importance of contextualization. Sensitivity to insider’s culture is non-negotiable in lesson planning, but this is just another part of a good preparation. What I am trying to say is that a teacher must know and understand the learner’s level, capacity, and need. It is always tempting to provide anything, but it doesn’t make sense. And I don’t think it’s a good idea.      

Defiant. Don’t be afraid to go against the book. Your idea might be a lot better than the provided textbook. Manipulate it. Change it if it is necessary. Be critical about it so that your creative mind or idea will be maximized. This is what I usually do especially if the book is so boring to death. 

Ego. As a teacher I let go of me – no more of me. It is all about my students and their welfare. So a good teacher is a student-centered, not a teacher-centered.   

Friendly-environment. To some countries, you cannot make friends with your students, but you can establish a lasting relationship for sure – a teacher-student rapport. More than that, you can make your classroom still a friendly-environment where no one feels threatened or transcendent or out of touch. Asian values relationship and so never exclude that in your day-to-day classroom engagement. After all, there is nothing to loose.

I hope you enjoy reading my thoughts.

Fooling Around?

I may have had wrestled believing a destiny didn’t want at all – becoming an educator for the rest of my life – a Nineveh of my own – despising it for countless times, but I have never fooled a student in my entire life of teaching.

Because each learner deserves the best, and so who am I to deprive that or dispossess from them every single wisdom under the sun?

Because I once was a learner, too, and so I know how it feels having false or worst teachers around.

Because I understand the fragility of engaging in this path and so it needs hard work, passion, love, and calling to be called the real one – not fooling someone around.

Because I respect real teachers who labor hard to educate each pupil along the way, and so who are you to distort that image?

“What do you do?” a lady asked.

“I am a teacher, if you don’t mind.” I replied.

“So how many students have you fooled?” She posed another question trying to be funny.

“You don’t want to hear what’s at the back of my mind!” I murmured trying to bite my tongue.

I got this silly question a lot, and very intolerant about this craziness at the same time. It is so annoying like having someone flicked my ears. Now I wonder how many learners she has been fooling around.

Don’t get me wrong, I am not tough with my students – just one of those concerned mentors. My philosophy of teaching is actually fun-learning and so it’s different from playing around. I may be funny at times in the classroom, but I never withhold each nugget of wisdom one learner needs to know.    

I use whatever possible creative means to teach my learners including those non-unfriendly gadgets have been invented so far, but not to fool my students around – it’s called necessity. Sorry to say, you will never see me in the media room the entire semester or term because my learners deserve better than that.    

“So how many students have you fooled?”

Ask that question to your self because that is not how I perceive grace or passion or calling or my love for my learners – I never fool around.

Labeling Me

“Why are you so smart?” he asked me to express his admiration.

“Thanks. But I’m just actually normal.” I said reluctantly trying not to draw attention to myself.

Not sure how much sincere he was for telling that though, but this isn’t what I got days before this conversation – from a local person whose eyes are only keen on white people – he was a different guy today.

I usually don’t get kind appraisals the first three hours in a dialogue; it takes a while for people to find that out or appreciate what I am good at. Maybe because I tend to avoid highly intellectual talks or preferred being playful or people perceived me the way I dress up or it’s not just in my look to possibly do unordinary stuff – and so I get this label most of the time – not a smart one.

Sorry to surprise friends a lot, but it’s not my intention to give someone a bolt from the blue of course. It is just a matter of personality. In fact, I’m also loud with my opinion but only if it is necessary.

Days before this awkward conversation, I was invited to play volleyball with my boss’ team. Showing off wasn’t the exact vocabulary, but to chill and have fun. I was trying to be modest, and so they’ve got me feeling I don’t play this particular sport at all. But I just did.

And days before this bizarre talk it was a different story. I was perceived as nobody (which I didn’t care anyway) because of the way I look. Since asked, so I had to tell what I do in years including my orientations.

Surprise!

We label people in different ways – it can be an assumption or a first impression basis or a very careful judgment or a reasonable and illogical feelings, etcetera. But mind you, whatever tag we put on someone, we should always leave room for correction.

Conclusions aren’t always right and so we must be willing enough to admit our mistakes. If not, just learn to simply say… “I stand corrected.” That if one is humble enough to let that imperfection be made known.

For this reason, people are being reminded from time to time one of the all time favorite sayings: “Don’t judge the book by its cover” – to avoid false perspective on someone or something – an assessment that requires repetitive analysis before jumping into conclusion – that’s I think a standard measurement.

Like I said, I never get the correct label as always, and so people are surprised to know the exact opposites of who I am. They must know me well first before throwing false ideas about me. Yes, we don’t have to taste the doughnut to know it is sweet, but that perception isn’t always applicable to every situation.

Remember that an assumption is different from thick description – it’s an old school thing I learned from the past – before setting a moral standard or cultural correctness – to avoid bad labels.

So don’t label me if you’re not sure what this little man can do. You better ask first.              

              

Tiny or Huge Room

People in the same boat will always have common things to talk about - whether a simple conversation or the one that truly needs heavenly wisdom to get the whole picture. I always prefer the former side for it doesn't take a nosebleed to enjoy such chit-chat. Not in my tiny room though, but in somebody else's this time where God's grace amazes me constantly. 

I used to call this place an orphanage - in so many instances - one fatherless like me can run to when famine struck my own place left me nothing to eat. For sure, this story of wonder is true to others as well - in this tiny room.

And used to call it a parsonage too where people of the same passion gathered together to testify the goodness of the One true Provider. Even the unspeakable joy is clear enough to discern. Not once but in innumerable times in this tiny room I know.

Now it is someone else's place. And for whatever purposes it is served, it's not mine to know. But once upon my life, this tiny room had become a home, a roof over my head, a shelter, and simply a kitchen where story of grace never ends - they are new every single time I was there.

From a tiny room to a huge room, this is how He blesses the ones He loves. Then I am not going to compare these two different spaces because both are the same - God can still display wonders and will continue to surprise us in ways one man couldn't imagine whether we have a small room or a big room at the moment.

Whether one is staying in a tiny room or not, He will bless this room big time. So that whoever witnesses this endless grace will bow down in awe.

I've been coming in and out of this huge room for a week now. In a short span of time, I've experienced the mercy that abounds including those seemingly unending get-together. Got so much to tell, but then again spaces don't matter. God meets us in both rooms; and where his children dwells, there He is in the midst of them.

Who doesn't like a spacious room?

If this is how He provides someone's need, then be it. After all, it's not what counts - it's the attitude - for a grateful heart creates a thankful home whether I'm having a huge room or just a tiny one.

What is a big room when you couldn't even invite a needy person or a hungry mouth or a thirsty soul or homeless one? I rather have a tiny room but filled with people who are in need of mercy and love and cares. 

This is what gracious grace is all about. Isn't it?

Of course, it is also a good thing to have a huge room to live, but if you don't know how to accommodate people in need, what's that room for aside from self-indulgence?