BLEND IN

 
"I wish I was taller. I wish I had fair skin. I wish I got long nose."

These are only few from my long lists. If one is true enough to admit, there maybe times we hated our imperfection. You should count me in! More than just valuing my outside look, I also have learned to love myself in and out regardless how others think of me. This is what self-acceptance all about.

It was in high school when I first heard the word blend. From a blend 45 coffee brand that was newly introduced in the community. But countless sips from this didn't explain a thing. I still don't get the point why such a product was named after a word. Lately, I started thinking about it and I came to grasp the concept behind.

The same thing with this brand, only in later years of my existence I fully understood the purpose of my physical feature. Insecurity and the lack of self-esteem were my teasers. When God's love filled my heart, my perception about the way I look has also changed. I am actually created unique for a reason - to blend in. I got it!



Cambridge Dictionary categorized blend in as a verb which means "to look or seem the same as surrounding people or things and therefore no be easily noticeable."  

And who am I to contest this definition? 

After all it is so true in my case, and in many instances.

When I lived in Saigon, the Vietnamese spoke to me in their own language. Thank God I learned such a tongue. Besides, I always got the impression being one of them. I don't mind. It's actually an honor.I blended in and it was for my own good. I can eat everywhere in the street without being ripped off so badly (let's say few cents). I can bargain in wet markets. No one bugged me as they do to white people. I can walk around even late at night because I look the same.

Moving to Cambodia was the same story. I blend in the more actually. I exactly got the same feature. If I don't speak in English no one can really tell. And when I began to utter words, that's when they are surprised. I can go to amusements without a ticket or with a local price. 

Off course, I don't want to take advantage and lie. I had once. I can ride a motodop not being cheated. I am a good bargainer, too. But blending in isn't enough, I have to speak Khmer too.

 

In Singapore Open Ultimate Frisbee Tournament, Malaysian delegates would speak to me in Bahasa. But I don't speak it, so I could not play around and just pretend that I am. I haven't been to Malaysia yet, for certain I'd blend in when I get there. Let see!

 

I traveled to Bangkok yearly, and so it was unavoidable that some people would always pissed off every time I speak in English to them. They think I pretend to be somebody else. I had no choice. I can't speak Thai. This is my only concern though, the rest (like safety or afraid of being fooled) I'm good. They are honest people. But if I decided to settle there, I could really blend in. I think it would be the same story moving to Laos or Burma or Indonesia or in Brunei. I'll blend in.